Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award Winning docu-series podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. Hot Podcasts. Anyone who has tried it knows it teaches him to cower and hide the next time he messes up and this defined my idea of how God saw me for far too long. In past blog sites I wrote about random funny stories or my process with the Lord, but I started this page while recovering from narcissistic and sociopathic abuse. Some patterns of abuse possibly even before Dick was on the scene. Playlists. Calling them accomplices in the oppression of a victim and pointing out that theyre devaluing the victims life in favor of the abusers might get me some backlash and Im just not ready or qualified to enter that ring.). He said, to be honest Im strongly considering heading back home. (It had taken him 3 hours in traffic to get to my house.) When they took him to dinner WITHOUT HER after just a few dates my jaw dropped. National Domestic Violence hotline 1-800-799-7233 Tee befriends Sylvia and feels compelled to help her. It was healing, though, to go back to the beginning and understand how I could have fallen for such an insidious trap. (Sounded exactly the same, but I will remember to flail differently right here if it pleases you.). Analyzing every response, I got very quiet and in my head. I gave up rights to my story when I gave it to Him. Terrifying, simultaneously, to see how this strategy operates and deceives intelligent and discerning people. And what is it really like to be doxxed and harassed online to the point the FBI has to get involved? With opening the eyes of anyone who reads this and needs it, because your freedom and empowerment matters. So to hear those words from my fiance, the person whose opinion I hold in the highest regard, cut really deep. I was simply drawn to it. Thats whats happening. I can see why people write the whole thing off, especially after hearing about how I allowed my dog to be treated. For free and confidential resources, please visit: somethingwaswrong.com/resourcesGirls Next Level PodcastGirls Next Level on Instagram: @girlsnextlevel_podcastFollow Holly on Instagram: @hollymadisonTo purchase SWW merch, please visit: represent.com/store/somethingwaswrongArtwork by the amazing Sara Stewart @GreaterThanOkay - Instagram.com/greaterthanokaySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Discount automatically applied at checkout, Book Review: A Story of Alcoholism, Pain, and Hope after Loss. Everything is fine., (I watched Jane the Virgin obsessively for multiple reasons, a big one being her developing her identity as a fiction writer.). Regardless of sexual orientation or life goals, I think women want to know if they are needed and desired while simply being. I may not be all things, but I can be obedient and He is faithful. In public, he was extremely high-energy and intense. What if exposure isnt such a bad thing? According to the DSM-5, traits of APD include: I was flippantly told multiple stories from his childhood about rebellion, lying, and getting in trouble with authority. Sara and her family might be a bit "extra," but it sounds like some of y'all have never dated women. Its a lighthearted nightmare in here, weirdos! Or we feel we need someone. On my off days, when Im not focused on how God sees me, I feel pretty basic and unoriginal. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Eventually, I became one of those things weighing him down and needed to be more aware of it (according to his friend Kimmy Jane Powers). With the cooperation of the investigative agency, Solvable by audiochuck takes the listener behind closed doors and speaks directly to the past and current personnel who are responsible for investigating these crimes. In careers, romantic relationships, etc, we might settle for something a step above or similar to what we knew before, because at least its not as bad. One of many is a phrase that loves to sneak its way in if I dont fight it. The story is told on a podcast called Something Was Wrong. So.What Else? S1 E2: It Was Weird. Thats all, folks! I thought the same thing! What was wrong, and how could I fix it? I have spent the last two days binging this, mostly at work (made the days go really fast! Something Was Wrong A weekly True Crime, Society and Culture podcast featuring Tiffany Reese 38 people rated this podcast About Insights Pro 180 25 1 17 RATING all john.krotzer May 15th, 2022 3 Soundslikemog May 8th, 2021 3 wastefreesteffi Apr 9th, 2021 1 Load More. When I regained control and came out, he looked at me like I was crazy. Its not gonna just go away. "SmartLess" with Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, & Will Arnett is a podcast that connects and unites people from all walks of life to learn about shared experiences through thoughtful dialogue and organic hilarity. Its ok, you dont need to make excuses. Ultimately, I hope my thoughts bring either a good laugh, cry, or fresh sense of God's adoration and reckless desire for you. or to justify a divorce to their church. Seriously, DONT. I cant continue to sacrifice words Ive been given at the risk of having them misunderstood. This episode comes out for free on Thursday, February 16th 2023. 2. I love scenes in movies that enter the main characters point of view and suddenly that church choir is looking directly at them, pigeoned there in the pews, belting WRITE THE THIIIIIIINGS! Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award-winning true-crime docuseries about the discovery, trauma, and recovery from shocking life events and abusive relationships. The police have you surrounded. With things being different, this means the stage is being set for those who have felt displaced, in waiting or unseen, perhaps with a story or passion but no clear platform for it. Simply switch between keys without allowing air to pass through their surface and your fingertips. Ive wondered if its an affront to His design when Christians continually refer to themselves and the church as wretched or even sinners saved by grace. (Here we go! Emotions came but I shoved them down and started thinking through examples he might be referring to. Your preferences, feelings, quirks, looks, secrets, weaknesses, strengths they all matter. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. I remember being thoroughly convinced of my incapability, frustrated to the point of tears when my music teachers wouldnt believe my arguments. if that's what it takes to get my daughter to see clearly. A gaslightingvictim is fed just enough truth to make them more accepting of a lie, like hiding a dogs medication in a treat. Yikes. In past blog sites I wrote about random funny stories or my process with the Lord, but I started this page while recovering from narcissistic and sociopathic abuse. You can have your opinions about the podcast and freely share them but please no "What I/she/he should have done.." narratives please. I laughed and cried all the way home, using the experience to learn how to trust my gut and we both moved on to live our best lives.). Time slowed down as I heard yelling and watched what felt like a movie scene. Humans are hardwired to need a vision, a hope of something more, something bigger than ourselves to invest in and be part of. Me a little smaller than before. 15. When I tried to explain that I tempered my excitement after noticing he seemed down and I didnt want to be insensitive, he shook his head like I was being silly and trying to cover something he could see right through. When I play it, I cant help but get lost in the stark contrasts of who I was during those hundreds of hours spent learning and refining it, and who I am now Mentally wandering through big, landmark memories of discovery, adventure, victories, and fears. Choosing peace that blatantly opposes the storm around them. We would have this wedding. If for some reason you always walk away from time with someone feeling like you have a lot of self-work to do instead of feeling bolstered and encouraged, take heed and maybe put your running shoes on. (Do you kinda feel that? Amy shares a personal story of pain, healing, survival and her search for justice. but decided on a whim to got back to season one and listen to Sara's whole story. Ill never forget a time in San Francisco when he purposefully drove his truck out of the way through a flooded corner, sending a massive wall of water straight up into the air that came crashing down on a crowd of people waiting to cross the street. I am not licensed to diagnose, but trusty ol Google checklists for APD and Sociopathy fit my experiences nearly 100%. Psalm 37 has been brought to my attention more than once its not a gentle read. This is not your story, you do not get to have . If I got distracted and checked out from making a daily connection with Him, I always knew I had Sunday to reset and re-center myself. It happens to have twists that make for great listening, which only gets it to more ears that might need to hear it. The pain of wondering and uncertainty is realand often buried deep. This is my favorite podcast. Unraveling situations and scenarios over the past 9 months has brought so much peace. If we didnt hear that message at crucial times from a parent or similar figure, well seek it elsewhere. I had been duped and thereis something better. Then it uses those keys to wreak havoc where trust was carefully built. I remember early on in our relationship, he handed $20 to a homeless person we walked by and later told me he kept 20 dollar bills in his pocket at all times for those exact opportunities. Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award-Winning immersive storytelling docuseries podcast that focuses on the discovery, trauma, and recovery from emotionally (and otherwise) abusive relationships. Ad-free epis Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award-winning true-crime docuseries about the discovery, trauma, and recovery from shocking life events and abusive relationships. One thing at the forefront of my thoughts right now is the fear I know a lot of women around me are facing, and the choices they are making in the midst of it. Or we tell ourselves its the best well get. (Anyone else get phrases or words rather than songs stuck in their heads?) Until one week before their wedding when she learned - something was wrong. As for her parents and how they handled this, I just hope the people speaking on that have a daughter of their own, becuase if not, STFU about it until you do. I know God literally commands us to be at peace and find joy even in terrible events; I just couldnt help but feel like joy would be a dismissal of the travesties, the economic and political devastation, worldwide deception, division and all-out spiritual war happening. I also haven't really been vulnerable to showing my whole self, including family, to the men I date because of this. A classic N doesnt want sympathy because they view themselves as above it. Enough to let go and be free. Something felt different. I have a feeling she's had to be the family empath, which made it a natural role with the narcissist fiance. https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Follow Sara Lewis on Instagram @SpaceandPurpose Check out Sara's Blog spaceandpurpose.com Something Was Wrong Podcast, featuring Sara's story Listen to Season 9 of Something Was Wrong now and subscribe to hear the next chapter of their story every Thursday. I was straightforward and told him exactly what I wrote at the beginning of this paragraph so that he could understand why his words hurt me so badly. For those who are unfamiliar with psychopathsand narcissists, this is one way they succeed while minimizing damage visible to the public eye. A good Father does not take away to leave a permanent void. There used to be a grating feeling in my gut that I was destined to attend womens luncheons and exchange flower pots until a young single pastor arrived and gave me my purpose. What will we attempt when we no longer see our lack, but His potential? Im just now binging. At this point, Im ready to use my writing to shed light, validate, and set free. Bravery is a choice of action regardless of fear being present. During my commute Ive been blasting the song Heroes by Amanda Cook from her album The Voyage, and every time she sings you taught my feet to dance upon disappointment, I burst with more emotions thanwhat should probably be considered safe for driving. Shes into Young Living. Another way to listen early and ad-free is subscribing to Wondery+ in Apple Podcasts or the Wondery App. When Im desperate for something, I remember Him and draw close. Hear from survivors who have never before agreed to share their story publicly in this heartbreaking and harrowing season. I have plenty of work I can get done. I was devastated and scrambling to recover whatever Id done wrong. It started with the role I play in His heart. They wont see the truth of who you really are or arent. Ive gone through seasons of counseling twice now. S1 E15: Safety + Coping Strategies for Leaving Abusive Relationships. Until the week before her wedding when she learned - something was wrong. That SAME song always, is so indescribably bad. We went about our work date, my heart racing and mind running wild. Scripture says we were crucified with Christ and are new creations. [Alice + John + Naomi] You Wouldn't Believe It. So many of us are so focused on getting our stories out there that we forget that becoming known has consequences. They pointed out how it was technically inaccurate because it was taken out of context. Playlists from our community. Requires subscription and macOS 11.4 or higher. At that moment this thought/impression entered my mind: If you could see as I do. The old man is dead. New episodes come out every Monday for free, with 1-week early access when you join Amazon Music or 1-week early and ad-free for Wondery+ subscribers Sara discusses the discovery of Dick's ex girlfriends and how answers help the healing process. Toxic relationship recovery stories, convos, + whatever else we want to hash out. Welcome to a spiritual war. It took an abusive relationship to say fuck what my family thinks. The program is hosted, written, and produced by Tiffany Reese. Season 6 explores these questions and more through stories of first person encounters with some of the internets most depraved offenders. Stress is never an excuse for insults and back-handed compliments- those should be followed with a genuine apology. Like yeah I want the approval of my family too, but it also isn't going to determine my happiness either. Its still happening. The people we surround ourselves with are who we will reflect, so hopefully were all chasing something that freaks us out on some level. Now is not the time to wait for one to reveal itself- you probably know exactly what it is, and that surely not. Yes! I was in tears over how poorly Id handled my distrust. Something Was Wrong is an award winning docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. When Sara got engaged, she thought that she was marrying the Christian man of her dreams. Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. When Sara Lewis shared her story on a podcast, she didn't think of herself as "brave." But when her story went viral, she quickly learned what it meant to be in the spotlight. . For free and confidential resources, please visit: somethingwaswrong.com/resourcesS15 Artwork by the amazing Sara Stewart @GreaterThanOkay - Instagram.com/greaterthanokayTo purchase SWW merch, please visit: represent.com/store/somethingwaswrongSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award-winning true-crime docuseries about the discovery, trauma, . It was the most confusing night of my life, but I felt a strange peace and clearly heard in my heart Sunday will be pivotal. I was so emotionally invested in moving forward that I assumed that meant everyone would understand and all would be well. He pulled me out of the trap to begin with; He will restore everything. All I remember is apologizing just to end the mess, him chuckling at my overreacting while continuing to fold clothes, and our night moving on. How will we live? I walk a line with choosing to blog about my real-time process, teetering toward avoidance when that process hits a bump in the road called full clarity and the resulting fury. However, this is my playground and Im honored to have your eyes as guests for a few moments.) Or experiencing fulfillment. (@SpaceandPurpose) Gratchki 4 yr. ago. The more examples he gave, the more memories came back. For free and confidential resources, please visit: somethingwaswrong.com/resourcesS15 Artwork by the amazing Sara Stewart @GreaterThanOkay - Instagram.com/greaterthanokayTo purchase SWW merch, please visit: represent.com/store/somethingwaswrongSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. (God forbid should observers figure out I have no idea what the hell Im doing.). It was a miraculous instance of God opening the eyes of one of His own whod been deceived into choosing a dangerous situation. In private, (more as time went on), there was a heaviness or something often weighing him down that I felt the need to support. The loosey-goosey-ness has been humbling and revealing. See historical chart positions, all 199 episodes, and more. Instead of the thorn shall come up the cypress; instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle; and it shall make a name for the Lord, an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.. It was reckless, cruel, and showed a total disregard for decency. The Bouge family narrowly escaped the Jonestown massacre November 18, 1978. Its easier to choose the less flashy accessories, the more practical car, the simpler outfit because I can hide from scrutiny. I have nothing to lose by sharing His story but maybe some pride, which I have to kill. Suns finally out, am I right?, Me: Oh! It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. I agree. It has nothing to do with exposing him as a person, but everything to do with re-constructing my own sense of reality, up from down, right from wrong. Happy to be an "enmeshed parent." My countenance fell and everything shifted. episodes discover Most Recent February 24, 2022 1 hr 24 min Download S11 E8: [Molly] Unimaginable Rage This week survivor Molly shares her story. For some reason, he threw on a fake New Jersey accent and waved his hand flippantly as he said, Yeah! He used no harsh language whatsoever. Until one week before their wedding when she learned - something was wrong. I grabbed the bags from the car, crossed the parking lot to greet him while my roommate continued on into the house, and when I saw his posture I paused. I usually tap my fingers nervously, hoping I dont have to get loud for the truth thats screaming in my head to be heard or to make myself seen in order for what I know is the right thing to get done. I encourage you to find even the smallest, most immediate platform you have to tell your story and use your voice. Listen on Apple Podcasts Requires subscription and macOS 11.4 or higher Hot, fresh fury colored my entire day in a way I couldnt shake as easily before. Sara begins to uncover more about her Fiance. The story is told on a podcast called Something Was Wrong. I was struck by the simplicity of that simple thought and how profoundly it changed my perspective. Those that lacked depth or true relationship with God are lost and floundering. I thought so too but upon checking this isn't the case. It was just a misunderstanding! Most of them are a bit extra IMO, lol. A cornered narcissist will spin you up in so many words that youll forget the origin of the conversation, forget your own point, and somehow end up at fault for something you still dont understand. My mom still references the night she and my dad told us they were giving us money for the wedding. It wasnt until hours later, at dinner (I still remember the really cool Asian restaurant we discovered in Oakland), that he tilted his head like a parent would toward a child and said, When are you going to talk to me about what you saw earlier today? The weirdest conversation proceeded. My current state of wholeness and freedom is a testimony to that. The excitement quickly faded when unexpected flashbacks accompanied the unboxing of last winters clothes, and with each cooler day, I started digging my heels into the ground to slow down the deja vus invading at random times. FREE interactive safety plan to help you prepare: loveisrespect.org. If we dont feel capable, there is Grace and we can ask for help! Despite many strange circumstances in Joes personal life, it was the best relationship Kenzie had ever hadBut when her loved ones began to suspect Joe wasnt at all who he said he was, they came together to uncover his secrets and save their friend just in the nick of time. The things this man put her and her family through is so intriguing and heartbreaking. Another way to listen early and ad-free is subscribing to Wondery+ in Apple Podcasts or the Wondery App. For those wondering and asking, I truly am doing well! With a list of reasons why he shouldnt pick them up, or boldly jumping into his arms with excitement? @Ramonaslefteye. Aside from writing, music, Frenchie videos and seeing the world, I also love learning about how to care for my health naturally. Sara and Tiffany answer listener questions and reflect back on the season thus far. We are all capable of being obedient, and in my case thats all God has been asking of me. It wreaks havoc on your mind, emotions and even your physical body. Enter your email address to receive notifications of new posts. I stand by what I said about not changing a thing. As the numbness wears off and Im pulling old files to compile my story, I read texts with clear eyes. Otherwise it just reveals a lack of character.). I have yet to find another one that I enjoy as much! Claim This Podcast Do you host or manage this podcast? One moment his extended family was super close in a way I could never understand. In the next, it wasnt worth visiting them because they were going to kick the bucket soon. Something Was Wrong. Stress, family drama, work, something was always burdening him. The other day, a line from one of Steffany Gretzingers songs was floating around in my head all day. A docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. Just recently I remembered his family asking me about my medical career while having dinner in Colorado. It sounds like they have scrutinized every relationship she has ever had before this. During this season, chemicals are bonding me to him and altering my brain, making it increasingly difficult to see clearly no matter how intelligent or discerning I might be. *Content warning: emotional and sexual abuse. Something Was Wrong When Sara got engaged, she thought she was marrying the Christian man of her dreams. Studying him and being sensitive, I set the grocery bags on the ground to hug him and was met with stony silence. Until the week before her wedding when she learned - something was. Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award-winning true-crime docuseries about the discovery, trauma, and recovery from shocking life events and abusive relationships. Something Was Wrong When Sara got engaged, she thought she was marrying the Christian man of her dreams. Pleaded for him to give it some time. Ive seen it reap destruction and keep people captive from chasing their potential. Join us for a heavy dose of research with a dash of comedy thrown in for flavor. r/podcasts: a subreddit to discover, discuss, and review podcasts with other podcast enthusiasts. As part of this mission, r/podcasts is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions. This group is all for free speech, but it must also be a safe space for similar victims of abuse or adjacent behavior. A docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. Its the only explanation, and the overarching joy in my freedom is a testimony to what He wants for all of us in a world full of stories like mine. *Content warning: fraud, emotional abuse, sexual coercion. Asking me about my medical career while having dinner in Colorado to recover whatever done... A message like this one immediate platform you have to kill something I! For great listening, which only gets it to more ears that might need make... 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